Movie 43 (2013)

Movie 43

In Movie Theaters January 25, 2013

Movie 43 release date January 25, 2013
STARRING: Elizabeth Banks, Kristen Bell, Halle Berry, Leslie Bibb, Kate Bosworth, Gerard Butler, Bobby Cannavale, Kieran Culkin, Josh Duhamel, Anna Faris, Richard Gere, John Hodgman, Terrence Howard, Hugh Jackman, Johnny Knoxville, Justin Long, Stephen Merchant, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Chloe Grace Moretz, Chris Pratt, Liev Schreiber, Seann William Scott, Emma Stone, Jason Sudeikis, Uma Thurman, Naomi Watts, Kate Winslet
DIRECTED BY: Elizabeth Banks, Steven Brill, Steve Carr, Rusty Cundieff, James Duffy, Griffin Dunne, Peter Farrelly, Patrik Forsberg, James Gunn, Bob Odenkirk, Brett Ratner
STUDIO: Relativity Media
RATING: R (For strong pervasive crude and sexual content including dialogue, graphic nudity, language, violence, drug use)
MOVIE 43 Official Website: www.whatismovie43.com
DVD Release Date: TBD
Movie 43 Box Office report:
Opening Day: $1,810,561
Opening Weekend: $4,805,878
Number of Theaters: 2,023
Total Gross: $8,803,979







Movie 43 features a long string of loosely connected sketches. Unfortunately for audience members, it doesn’t contain enough loosely connected laughs, which is a big problem since it has no plot to fall back on. That’s the downside to breaking a comedy into segments, and that’s the reason why most comedies that do typically go with the shotgun/slapstick humor approach. By cramming sight jokes, wordplay jokes, physical jokes and premise jokes into one repeatedly firing weapon, such movies are able to minimize dead air, but this one stupidly doesn’t do that. It relies largely on set-ups that take too long to unfold and mostly fail to go anywhere after they do.

Writing funny sketches is an extremely difficult task. Some of the Saturday Night Live writers have been at it for decades, and they still have trouble figuring out the specifics, like when to cut away and how long to pause between jokes. Even during the best of seasons the hit rate is maybe fifty percent, but we collectively give that show (at least somewhat of) a free pass because the writers and performers need to fill an hour and a half twenty-five or so Saturdays a year, with only one shot each week at getting it right. Movie 43, however, had more than four years and dozens of takes with some of the biggest actors and actresses in the world to get it right. There's really no excuse for awkwardness or bits that just don’t work, and too many of these bits do not work at all.

From a man with balls dangling from his chin to a new MP3 player that’s actually a naked woman, Movie 43 is filled segments that never should have made it past the planning stages. They’re dead from almost the instant they hit the screen, and since they come early in the film, they make the whole thing look amateurish and sophomoric. Later, a few segments (Robin speed dating, Kieran Culkin and Emma Stone arguing about their love life, extreme homeschooling) actually have some chuckles within them, but even these high moments still feel like missed opportunities. For example: Movie 43 features a sketch about parents who home school their child trying to give him an authentic experience by screaming insults at him and making his life awkward, but it’s far funnier in theory than it actually is on the screen.

There aren’t enough unapologetically R-rated comedies released today. Studios are usually so fixated on the amount of money they could make by stripping away the f-words and the boobs that really edgy material doesn’t make it past the concept stages. Here, the filmmakers were actually given the green light to go there, and disappointingly, they mostly responded like fifteen-year-old boys, littering the final product with pointless fart jokes, insults we’ve all heard before and half-hearted apologies we didn’t need. This isn’t 1960. There isn’t anything inherently shocking about seeing a vagina or watching a man shit his pants. There has to be a layer beyond that.







Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters

Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters

In Movie Theaters January 25, 2013

Hansel And Gretel Witch Hunters theatrical release date January 25, 2013.
STARRING: Jeremy Renner, Gemma Arterton, Peter Stormare, Famke Janssen, Thomas Mann
DIRECTED BY: Tommy Wirkola
STUDIO: Paramount Pictures
RATING: R (For violence, language, adult themes)
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters Box Office report:
Opening Day: $6,018,171
Opening Weekend: $19,690,956
Number of Theaters: 3,372
Total Gross: TBD








Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters packs one out-of-left-field surprise, but it arrives during the opening credits, and the delicious twists dissipate as the film trudges along.

Here’s the shock: Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, collaborators on such subversively absurd comedies as Anchorman, Step Brothers and Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby receive co-producer credits, presenting the horror/fairy-tale hybrid through their Gary Sanchez Productions banner. For a moment, we get a glimmer of hope that H&G will approach its Grimm-twist mash-up with a welcome wink and a macabre sense of humor. You know, the kind of “we’re in on the joke” nod that should accompany any movie brazen enough to call itself Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters. Isn’t this why you hire Tommy Wirkola, the writer-director who dared to introduce Nazi zombies in the cult-horror effort Dead Snow?

Alas, H&G commits the sin of taking itself too seriously … which is to say, it injects even a modicum of seriousness into a premise that begs to high-dive off the deep end of irrationality with its tongue planted firmly in its cheek. Far short of being dismissed as a failure, H&G just isn’t as much fun as you’d imagine.

The title sells the story. After their legendary candy-house encounter with a vicious witch, survivor siblings Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) make a living as bloodthirsty mercenaries hired by terrified townsfolk who report missing children and fear the latest witch infestation. Our leather-clad bounty hunters are extremely busy as of late, for powerful Muriel (Famke Janssen) and a coven of killers are collecting sacrificial lambs for a rare blood moon, and only The Avengers … er, Hansel and Gretel can nip the plan in the bud.

Arterton does what she can to liven the movie’s dour tone, channeling her inner Han Solo to turn Gretel into a stone-cold bitch warrior who practically barks “Ain’t nobody got time for that” as she evades trolls, eviscerates witches and fends off a predatory sheriff played by Peter Stormare. (Because whom else would you hire to play a lecherous sheriff in a movie called Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters?) Arterton shows she’s better equipped to play an action lead than the flimsy second banana – where she floundered in Prince of Persia and even Quantum of Solace. Her spunk actually balances out Renner, who does cool instead of charismatic in a misguided effort to push the film toward a legitimacy it doesn’t earn.

Structurally, Gretel neglects to come up with much beyond its concept, which puts a hardened spin on the classic Grimm fairy tale. It’s perfectly natural to want to imagine Hansel and Gretel channeling an inner rage following their near-fatal encounter with a sorceress. But H&G suffers from a saggy midsection as Wirkola figures out how to pad his barely-90-minute film until he can crank up the heat for a Rambo-esque finale. Time-killers range from a love interest for Hansel (played by Pihla Viitala) to a gentle giant named Edward, who befriends Gretel and proves useful when the chips are on the table.

The director, however, is better equipped at ladling out buckets of blood than he is at maintaining suspense or tension. Gretel delivers on the promise of gore, as limbs are torn from bodies and messengers explode after eating combustible worms, spraying tavern patrons with internal organs. The spray of crimson blood cuts through the grim production scheme (no pun intended) and drab visual palette. The movie's often mean and nasty, but that's really its saving grace. “That was awesome,” screams a young Hansel and Gretel groupie after a grisly kill, and you might agree, of that’s your thing.

I’m not saying there isn’t franchise potential here. Never forget, even Clash of the Titans inspired a sequel. Maybe this is the start of a series. We can only hope future installments realize the inherent ludicrousness of the given premise. And at the very least, if H&G finds an audience, expect to see another recognizable figure from stories past hunting werewolves, possibly as early as 2014.









Hors Satan 2013

Hors Satan (Outside Satan)

In Movie Theaters January 18, 2013

Outside Satan theatrical release date January 18, 2013.
The About face: A fantastic French film that you will you likely have to wait to see on Netflix or DVD. A miracle reveals an unseen side of a village loner.
The Wild side: At the edge of the English Channel, on the Côte d’Opale, near a hamlet, its dunes and marshes, there lives a strange fellow who gets by somehow, poaches, prays and builds fires. A vagrant who appears from nowhere and who, in a single breath, hounds out the evil from a village haunted by the devil and places the world outside of Satan.
The Movie facts: Very rarely does WAM feature a movie in its main theatrical release section that gets play in less than a handful of movie theaters. This, Outside Satan, is one movie that is not to be missed if you love French films.
Watch the R-rated movie trailer of Outside Satan, below, just so that you can whet your appetite.
STARRING: David Dewaele, Alexandra Lemâtre, Christophe Bon
DIRECTED BY: Bruno Dumont
STUDIO: New Yorker Films
RATING: Not Rated (Nudity, extreme violence, language, adult themes)



Synopsis
Angel or devil, good or evil, Christ or Satan: These are the mystical questions revolving around the nameless figure living in the coastal dunes outside of a small French town. This mysterious drifter begins to touch the lives of a group of women in the village, including a single mother caring for her sick daughter, a hitchhiker passing through en route to Boulogne, and, most vividly, a teenage girl living in an abusive household. The stranger and the girl form a special bond as he saves her from her dilemma and she wanders through dunes and marshes with him, witnessing his unusual acts of wonder and questioning his role in her life.

Mama 2013

Mama

In Movie Theaters January 18, 2013

Mama release date January 18, 2013
STARRING: Jessica Chastain
DIRECTED BY: Andres Muschietti
STUDIO: Universal Pictures
RATING: PG-13 (For violence, language, adult themes)
MAMA Official Website: www.mamamovie.com
DVD Release Date: TBD
Mama Movie Box Office report:
Opening Day: $10,300,000
Opening Weekend: $28,123,000
Number of Theaters: 2,647
Total Gross: TBD





Synopsis
A loving couple learn that their two adopted nieces have brought a dark secret into their home in this foreboding domestic thriller from executive producer Guillermo del Toro (Pan's Labyrinth), and director Andy Muschietti. Victoria and Lilly were just little girls when their father murdered their mother. In the aftermath of that tragedy, both girls disappeared without a trace. Desperate, their Uncle Lucas (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) and his girlfriend Annabel (Jessica Chastain) searched everywhere for the missing girls. Five years later, Victoria and Lilly are both found living in a derelict cabin deep in the woods. Incredibly, they've managed to survive on their own, though years of isolation have left them both in a feral state, and unable to communicate. Without hesitation, Lucas and Annabel welcome the two frightened girls into their home, and work hard to make them feel comfortable. But when a series of ominous events lead Lucas and Annabel to suspect that Victoria and Lilly share ties to an evil beyond human comprehension, the couple must discern whether the two young girls are merely dealing with the emotional aftershocks of a life-altering tragedy, or have attracted a force that could destroy their family all over again.





Broken City 2013

Broken City

In Movie Theaters January 18, 2013

Broken City release date January 18, 2013
STARRING: Mark Wahlberg, Russell Crowe, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Jeffrey Wright, Barry Pepper
DIRECTED BY: Allen Hughes
STUDIO: 20th Century Fox
RATING: R (For violence, language, adult situations)
BROKEN CITY Official Wesbite: www.brokencitymovie.com
DVD Release Date: TBD
Broken City Movie Box Office report:
Opening Day: $2,950,000
Opening Weekend: Opening Weekend: $8,900,000
Number of Theaters: 2,260
Total Gross: $19,977,423






Synopsis

In a broken city rife with injustice, ex-cop Billy Taggart seeks redemption - and revenge - after being double-crossed and then framed by its most powerful figure, the mayor. Billy's relentless pursuit of justice, matched only by his streetwise toughness, makes him an unstoppable force - and the mayor's worst nightmare."
In a broken city rife with injustice, ex-cop Billy Taggart seeks redemption - and revenge - after being double-crossed and then framed by






The Last Stand 2013

The Last Stand

In Movie Theaters January 18, 2013

The Last Stand release date January 18, 2013
Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Johnny Knoxville, Luis Guizman, Jamie Alexander, Forest Whitaker, Peter Stormare, Harry Dean Stanton
Director: Jee-woon Kim
Movie Studio: Lionsgate
Rating: R (For violence, language, adult situations)
THE LAST STAND Official Website: www.thelaststandfilm.com
DVD Release Date: May 14, 2013

The Last Stand Movie Box Office report:
Opening Day: $2,010,000
Opening Weekend: $6,300,000
Number of Theaters: 2,913
Total Gross: $12,050,299






Action icon Arnold Schwarzenegger makes his much-anticipated return to the big screen in Korean director Kim Jee-woon's hard-hitting US directorial debut, THE LAST STAND. After leaving his LAPD narcotics post following a bungled operation that left him wracked with remorse and regret, Sheriff Ray Owens (Schwarzenegger) moved out of Los Angeles and settled into a life fighting what little crime takes place in sleepy border town Sommerton Junction. But that peaceful existence is shattered when Gabriel Cortez (Eduardo Noriega), the most notorious, wanted drug kingpin in the western hemisphere, makes a deadly yet spectacular escape from an FBI prisoner convoy. With the help of a fierce band of lawless mercenaries led by the icy Burrell (Peter Stormare), Cortez begins racing towards the US-Mexico border at 250 mph in a specially-outfitted Corvette ZR1 with a hostage in tow.









Gangster Squad 2013

Gangster Squad

In Movie Theaters January 11, 2013

Gangster Squad release date Janaury 11, 2013
STARRING: Ryan Gosling, Sean Penn, Nick Nolte, Emma Stone, Josh Brolin, Michael Pena, Giovanni Ribisi, Robert Patrick
DIRECTED BY: Ruben Fleischer
STUDIO: Warner Bros.
RATING: R (For violence, language, adult themes)
GANGSTER SQUAD Official Website: www.gangstersquad.warnerbros.com
DVD Release Date: TBD
Gangster Squad Movie Box Office report:
Opening Day: $6,714,883
Opening Weekend: $17,070,347
Number of Theaters: 3,103
Total Gross: $45,661,165





An elite police squad fights to save the city of Los Angeles from a power-hungry East Coast mobster in this gritty police-detective film set in the 1940s, and based on Paul Lieberman's seven-part Los Angeles Times series "Tales From the Gangster Squad." Jewish gangster Mickey Cohen (Sean Penn) is a Brooklyn-born boxer-turned-L.A. kingpin whose brutal ambition has earned him the respect of the Italian mob. He's the kind of crime boss who dines with judges and police chiefs, but still isn't quite sure which fork to use when it comes time for the main course. Just when it begins to look like Cohen owns every cop in the city, however, LAPD Chief Parker (Nick Nolte) enlists honest cop Sgt. John O'Mara (Josh Brolin) to assemble a top-secret task force that will burn the vicious gangster's thriving criminal empire to the ground. With the help of his pregnant wife Connie (Mireille Enos), Sgt. O'Mara handpicks smooth-talking Sgt. Jerry Wooters (Ryan Gosling), heroin-hating Officer Coleman Harris (Anthony Mackie), deadeye Officer Max Kennard (Robert Patrick), and brilliant wireman Officer Conwell Keeler (Giovanni Ribisi) for the task at hand. Joined by Officer Kennard's tough sidekick Officer Navidad Ramirez (Michael Peña) as they set out for their first job, the squad strike fast and hard at the core of Cohen's operation. Meanwhile, the charming Sgt. Wooters flirts with danger by starting an affair with Cohen's smoldering paramour Grace Faraday (Emma Stone). Shortly after learning that Cohen is plotting a power play that will cement his stronghold on the city, however, the squad are unexpectedly compromised, putting the lives of all of their families in danger and leaving them with little choice but to step up their efforts and target the ruthless gangster directly. Should they live to accomplish their mission, Sgt. O'Mara and his men will prevent L.A. from becoming a hive of criminal activity like Chicago or New York. But Cohen isn't going down without a fight, and if he falls, the entire city will feel the aftershock.